Tuesday, October 27, 2009

A soul journey.

Where do you find your peace?

We're at a time of decision and transition in this house. There is a bit of discord, a bit of excitement, a bit of worry, and a lot of deep-down-hard-to-reach-to-the-gut soul searching. Discussions over strawberry waffles about new places and different scenery turn to long drives to clear heads and then there are more discussions of new places (this time over Vietnamese food). Paths are crossing and turning in unexpected directions and then looping around into oblong shapes that won't fit neatly into the angular hole we've cut out for it.

What it is like to have a personal goal and a steady direction: New, exciting, peaceful, inspiring, dreamy.

What it is like when my ideals/goals/directions do not line up with the man of the house: Frustrating, frustrating, frustrating.

What it is like to compromise with someone: Hard.

I have such an idea of what I want for myself. A couple of degrees, a home office or collaboration of like minded individuals, a healing place, artistic freedom, and a nice little home in the mountains. This is where I want to be. I want a degree in Nutrition and I want a masters in Chinese Medicine and I want to heal through gentle ways and provide a safe place for others. This is a new goal for me and I'm proud of it. I find my peace in these ideas.

Unfortunately, it seems that the path I would choose to take to get there doesn't coincide with the wants of my other. Our peaces are separate, our ideas polar, our journey is presently rocky. We need to find a new ground to stand on (and we will). We need new ideas, new excitement.

And so I ask you, where do you find your peace?


Brianna said...

Peace is found within, not somewhere overt. And as far as making compromises... that IS hard. My "other" and I try to remember that "love" is support, through ALL things, and if one of us has a dream, we do our best to help the other reach that dream. We believe that through support and perseverance, our paths eventually converge anyway.....

Jacqueline said...

I want trees and warmth in a cold place. Somewhere where I can learn something new everyday and love my career. He wants his town to be functional and a job that pays well. It's so hard. I knew you'd understand this.